Apollo Anton Ohno.... OH YES! Or: In Which I Make Ridiculous Puns

Ok, so I have been unable to peel my retinas away from the Winter Olympics on my flatscreen for about 3 days... 7 days... shit, I don't even know how many days, they all seem to blend together after a while.

Every time the Olympics are on... it's the only thing I watch all day, every day. Since the invention of TiVo and DVRs I now have the advantage of taping all the events so I don't feel pressured to hold my bladder in order to catch the end of the luge event... Also, I can tape the events that are going on while I'm sleeping or working, and not miss a single second of awesome.

It's a bummer when a year is a non-olympic year - it's my personal belief that they should start hosting a Spring and Fall Olympics so that every year can be an olympic year.

What would the Spring and Fall Olympic events consist of? Here's a sample list to get the Olympic committee started on their subsequent development of the Spring and Fall Olympics:

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Summa Summa Summatime

Since I have been complaining about the cold a lot, and really, no one likes a complainer, I decided the best way to avoid complaining 'bout the frigid temperatures is to escape into a little fantasy world where it's summer all the time (Or... Southern California. Why did R and I move back? Why?). Anyway, summers in Chicago ARE. THE. SHIT. Sorry, other cities, but Chicago rules and you just drool.

The things I get to look forward to every year: walks/bikes along the Lake Michigan lakefront path, beach volleyball, Taste of Chicago, outdoor concerts, and most notably: Castaways at North Avenue Beach.

For the out-of-towners, Castaways is my favorite place in the world. It is my own personal Disneyland: The Happiest Place On Earth. It is a seasonal, summer only bar on Chicago's North Avenue beach, atop a building made to look like a giant ship. They serve bar food (Nachooooo!) and some very excellent frozen, fruity drinks. My fave? The Miami Vice - half Pina Colada, half Strawberry Daiquiri. YUM! It's also packed to the gills on a daily basis with over-tanned meat heads and their silicone breasted girlfriends.

It's like The Jersey Shore in Chicago. (I realize this is, like, the 4th post in a row that I have referenced Jersey Shore, but... I can't help it. It's so trashtastically wonderful! Gym, Tan, Laundry anyone?)

What could be better than people-watching on top of a fake boat, getting sloshed during the middle of the day? The answer, my friends, is nothing. Nothing is better than that.

Anyway, I have all these wonderful existing summer traditions, but 2010 is about new things! As of late, I have been day-dreaming about this summer and all the fun things I want to do. I thought I'd share, and maybe gather some further suggestions for 2010 summer adventures. And away we go!

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Baby It's Cold Outside

So, it's Friday. That means 2 full days of no work, and the freedom to do nothing at all. Being that it's January, and the temperatures here have dipped into single digits, we are hibernating for the winter. Add to that the foot (feet, maybe) of snow we just got, and the prospect of going out on the weekends is nil. My party clothes just aren't built for this kind of weather. Let's look at the numbers, shall we? Six inches of stilletto + 24 inches of snow = 16 inches of cold, wet leg. I hate the cold, but I love to complain about it, so it's for the best that we re-emerge to our social lives and nights out only once the ground thaws.

Staying cozy in weather like this is a must. I cannot survive hibernation without my favorite things, so I present to you:

Simply T's Guide to Staying Roasty Toasty

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